Have you ever seen someone who has given up? Not just a job or even a sporting event, but someone who has given up on their dreams and on the idea of thriving.
You might think you really haven’t, but I bet you have seen plenty of defeated folks. What causes this? I think people stop searching and fighting for better lives when they believe all that work won’t bring them the desires of their heart. They lose hope. Too many things go wrong and life is "fruitless."
But what about the folks who get so beat up over and over again, and they still succeed – or even go on to have uncommon achievement? How do they do it?
When he was a young child, his family fell into world shattering poverty. After a few years his father left the family. Instantly his Mom had to be the sole provider for 5 children. His father's betrayal caused a persistent anger he didn’t fully recognize until much later in his twenties. He was a skilled wrestler, but chose acting instead.
Just when things started to really pop as an actor a health issue was discovered. Doctors found a brain tumor the size of a golf ball behind his left ear. Mark Ruffalo was told there was an 80% chance he might never get the feeling back in his face. After surgery, the entire side of his face was numb for 10 months while he rehabbed and hoped he could act again someday. Miraculously, things started to get much better for Ruffalo.
Maybe you even know that Mark Ruffalo was nominated for an Oscar after his work in the movie The Kids Are Alright. One success after another soon started to flow for the talented actor. But then another devastating tragedy struck. Ruffalo’s 39-year-old brother was murdered right in his home. Much mystery surrounded the incident and no one was ever charged.
Ruffalo wondered when the firing squad of bad luck would cease fire for a while. Eventually it did, and because of the odd timing of things he actually scored a major role in the largest film franchise in history playing The Hulk in Marvels series of super hero blockbusters.
The extraordinarily brutal timing of all of this is now referred to as “Getting Ruffalo-ed” by his friends and others. It’s when horrible luck ends up creating an incredibly fortunate silver lining.
That’s what this article is about. I believe there is something more to this “Getting Ruffalo-ed.” And I’m sure there has to be a better name for it.
Even though he admits to being a very angry person at one point in his life, it certainly appears that Mark has gotten it under control. He tried many different things and finally discovered the benefits of meditation. He says it saved his life.
I believe Ruffalo was able to tap into something inside himself that the incredible pain created or even birthed. It’s a capsule of pure power and love that pain and tragedy brings out. It’s quite remarkable. And there are many cases of people tapping into theirs and being launched into uncommon abundance and success.
See this isn’t something that you need to change into to turn things around. Your habits won’t really help you evolve into having the favor this special pod will bring. Sure you can probably change your life by doing things many motivational speakers will suggest, and that would be great. But I’m talking about something else. And because of the tsunami of misfortune you’ve endured you already possess it. You only need to access it and allow it to go to work for you. That’s a difficult thing for most people to access.
For every inspiring example of one person who has found this incredible magic, there are thousands who have not. Multitudes of abused sleepwalkers. So that’s why I started off asking you if you have ever seen someone who has totally given up? Certainly not for everyone who has been dealt a bad hand, but for some, total surrender is an important factor in making a comeback. We hear that all the time. This isn’t a new discovery.
But how do you get to the good stuff quicker so you can turn the ship around? After multiple visits to a very dark place, mental illness, addiction and multiple discoveries of colorectal cancer I believe I’ve found something this invisible sweetness. After feeling the lowest of lows pain brought me to just a little bit of light. Just enough light to push an angry man teetering on total “eff it” to land on this side of investigation. There must be more. And there is. It’s even way beyond getting “Ruffalo-ed” and past what they call Post Traumatic Growth.
I can wait to describe this special thing in my next blog.